Downeast Dog News
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Ask Bammy an Advice Column for Dogs by a Dog

By Nancy Holmes | May 01, 2018

I am a Carolina Dog, a breed that long ago owned Native American people. We were designed by natural selection to be so intelligent and physically superior that we survived without humans. My great-grandfather was caught from the wild. I can offer advice based on the natural instincts and abilities of wild dogs. My human and I have had lots of training classes and other experiences. Some humans call themselves Mom or Dad of their dog, but I call my human, tongue in cheek, Boss. Much as I love her, I admit she has many of the same odd notions as most humans, so I can relate to other dogs with problem humans. If I can’t help, at least I can offer sympathy, and we can have fun talking about our amazing humans. Please send your questions! Bammy, 280 Pond Rd. Newcastle, ME 04553, or email: askbammy@tidewater.net

A letter from my good friend Eddie:

Dear Bammy,

My humans and I were so happy with your letter to me.

Our city life here seems to revolve around work. My humans have been very busy this winter. They hardly ever have any fun throwing my toys. One stays home, but she spends all her time in front of that thing they call a computer. She says she is writing a book and has a deadline. The other one leaves every day to go to a place called "the city," but I've never been there. They say I would hate all the noise.

I decided I needed to work, too. I call my business, “Mouse Busters.” A friend of my humans trapped a mouse in her house. They were afraid they had more, so I checked it out - three whole floors! I smelled a lot of interesting smells, but no mouse. They petted me and gave me treats anyway.

My second job proved much more exciting. My humans sometimes hunt for food in a place called a health food store that had a mouse problem. I searched the store and located the place where the mice entered through underground pipes. They had the hole fixed, and no more mice! I got lots of pets and treats there.

My humans tell me that we have to "dress for success" in the city, so I have to wear a collar and tie when I go to a job. Fortunately, they take it off when I get down to business. Everyone who sees me in this get-up seems duly impressed and calls me "Mr. Businessman." I don't get it, but I get lots of treats just for showing up.

That's my city life. It sounds like you are having lots of fun up in Maine.

Your friend from away,

Eddie

 

Dear Eddie,

So good to hear from you, and congratulations on your new business! Boss and I wish you could find the mouse holes in our den. We hear them scrabbling around in the walls, but we can’t find how they get in.

My dear friend Pookah has just left after a long visit while her pack was away. I barked for her as she went, but she raced home to her special human. I’m so sad! I watch her den from my window, hoping to see her coming back to me. I live far from the road, so she can run back and forth between our dens. She comes to visit a lot, but I want her living in my den.

I’m doing agility again after a long vacation. Boss has lightened up a lot, and she gives me real *MEAT* rewards!

Wishing you successful mousing!

Bammy