Downeast Dog News

Ask Bammy

By Nancy Holmes | Nov 01, 2020
Photo by: N Holmes Vicious Vacuum Cleaner

I am a Carolina Dog, a breed that long ago owned Native American people. We were designed by natural selection to be so intelligent and physically superior that we survived without human help. My great-grandfather was caught from the wild. I can offer advice based on the natural instincts and attributes of wild dogs. In addition, my adopted person and I have had lots of training classes and other experiences. Some humans call themselves Mom or Dad of their dog, but I refer to my human, tongue in cheek, as Boss. Much as I love her, I admit she has many of the same odd notions as most humans, so I can relate to other dogs with problem humans. If I can’t help, at least I can offer sympathy, and we can have some fun talking about our amazing humans. Please send your questions! N. Holmes, 280 Pond Rd., Newcastle, ME 04553, or email:


Dear Bammy,

My question is about all the loud, scary things that my family has. The worst one stands in a corner with its leash fastened to another leash on the floor. At least once a day, Mom picks up the leash and lets the thing pull her around the room. It makes a horrible smell and a noise like a howl and growl at the same time. It sort of scrubs back and forth and sometimes it makes a different noise and bites the corner of a rug. Then Mom growls at it and makes it lie down while she pulls the rug out of its mouth. If she hates when it eats rugs, why does she let it pull her around the room like that? I try to stay away from it, but it goes into every place I can think of to hide, so I have to keep running from it.

That’s only one thing. There are other loud, vicious things that live in the garage and pull people around outdoors. Mostly, they go around on the lawn, so I just go up on the steps and huddle against the door, so they won’t see me. In winter, they have a thing that makes its own snowstorm. Puppy, you want to stay away from that one!

Bammy, does your Boss have things like that? Do you have good places to hide? Why do people keep things like that, anyway?



Dear Skittish,

Yes, I have the same problems. Why do our dear humans allow those machines to pull them around like that? All you skittish dogs might like to know that some dogs actually fight them. There’s a Border Collie I know who runs along beside the thing that makes the grass smell good. She barks and nips at its feet. Sometimes her human laughs at her, and sometimes he tells her to shut up. How ungrateful! That brave dog is trying to keep it from attacking him, and she even tries to herd the vicious thing away from her house. I notice that humans don’t let their young puppies anywhere near those when they are growling. That tells you something!

Outdoors, I just stay as far away from the grass thing as I can. If it turns in my direction, I pretend I have some business behind the bushes until it goes away. I go up on the steps too, but when it comes toward me, I just saunter away as if I was leaving anyway. I think it’s a big mistake to let those things know you are scared of them. In the house, I go into my crate. It’s my fort and my bed. I hope you have a crate in your house. It’s your special place, and you should always be safe and comfortable there.

Be a brave dog, Skittish!